Did you know someone that committed suicide? And did it affect you anyway?

Now i didn't know him to well but my dad committed suicide when i was a 1 year old, it has affected me a lot in life, because i never had a father figure growing up, had no one to talk to about 'guy' problems, no to teach me about stuff like life and possibly women and even the things like learning how to shave and about cars.

The thing i will miss most is not knowing what kind of person he was, and the small things like not knowing what his voice sounds like, how he smiled, what kind of laugh he had, i only know what he looks like from pictures and even things like what he smelt like is all the kind of stuff i will never get experience of my dad.

Oh though i have grown up fine, and have turned out fine, my whole concept on being a father figure is muddled because i had no one to observe and to teach me, i think i will be an excellent father and i will have to learn a lot when that time comes around, but i really wish i had that in my life.

Thanks for reading.

Im sorry for your loss.

I know its no condolences, but dads are never really as good as they seem. You tend to figure out how you want to be as a father by the stuff you hated about your dad.

Luckily, i have never been effected by the sadness of someone i knowing taking their life.

It is the single most selfish act a person can commit. an unforgivable sin (although i dont believe in god). People dont think of the consequences. A person takes their life and leaves an child to grow up without a parent... they jump in front of a train - the train driver's life gets messed up by seeing something so horrific. but i can understand why some people may be driven to this extent and its not a pleasant thought. I can only feel sorry for the people that lose the most from this and offer my support.


I hope you feel less doomed matt. Know you have friends and family that are there for you.

I disagree with you Mijy. I've spent some time doing phone counselling, and one of the callers I talked to was thinking of committing suicide. I can't remember her circumstances at all, I only remember how sad she was. No sad isn't the right word. She was depressed, blue, and couldn't see a way out of those feelings. I think I was able to help encourage her to continue being safe and find some supports to help her through what she was going through, but the reality is that I just don't know how she is.

I don't think suicide is selfish, but short sighted. They may think of the consequences of their death, but instead of seeing their loved ones upset, they might see their death as lifting a burden from them, or another benefit. I think it's completely tragic that people cannot see any other way out from their pain other than ending it all. Suicide is a terrible way to die, it's often violent (gun/car crash) or a struggle to get through (overdose) and just generally painful - both emotionally and physically.

I haven't had any personal experience with a loved one attempting or committing suicide, so I really have no idea of what it's like to go through. One of my closest friends though, she has depression and really struggles with it. It pains me to see her go through what she does, but there's so little that I can really do. My nanna as well, she hasn't been diagnosed with anything, but she definitely isn't well. I hate having to stand by and watch her fall deeper and be able to do almost nothing to help her.

Because the thing is, if someone wants to commit suicide, there is only so much the people around them can do. The person who is suicidal has to find the will to live in themselves. What we were taught to do in telephone counselling is find a link for the suicide caller to live - like another person who may be sad if they passed away, or a pet who would no longer have their favourite owner. But it's hard sometimes if someone is in such a deep deep funk. It's like, like they have a dementor following them around everywhere, just waiting for the opportune moment to suck out their soul.

Sorry for the wall of text, I've thought a lot about all of this over the last few years.

I agree with you Mijy when you say that dads aren't as good as they seem. I've figured out a lot of what I should and shouldn't do in the future by the stuff that I've hated about my parents as well, but that's all open to opinion. Some people have great relationships with their parents. In the end people are always going to miss what they don't have and everyone deserves to have a good father.

I don't think commiting suicide is a selfish act though. It is a sad thing to happen, but people only do it because they are very depressed and don't have the will to live anymore. For someone to commit suicide, I think they would have to be so depressed that they just don't care about other people and how it would affect them. The other people could be seen as just as selfish for keeping that person alive.

I don't know anyone who commited suicide, but there have been times in the past where I have been so sad that I have considered doing it. I guess the difference now is that when I'm that sad I just move on, go with the flow so to speak and just dealing with **** as it comes, not worrying about my problems.